Ruminating On My Shitty Family

Before I get started, I want you all to know, that I am practicing kindness towards my shitty family.

That said, the devastation that poverty brings is significant!

As I look back at growing up with my cousins and all of their parents (on one side of the family), I am reminded of the horrors of growing up poor.

All of the adults in this dynamic were employed, but none of them had an education.

Personally, I feel as though if you want to work, you shouldn’t be making total peanuts. Education or no education.

Moving on…

None of my family ever reaches out to me or anyone I am close to.

I’ve done plenty of reaching out on my own, but they just do not reciprocate.

It’s sad; and, I personally blame poor role models, a lack of desire for healing/personal development, as well as (of course), all of us growing up impoverished.

I mean, is it normal to only see one another at the “more important” funerals?

Weddings are also overlooked.

And, sadly, I think that this is fast becoming the way that it is!

Maybe it’s just me, but I wonder…

How did you all grow up, and how do you get along with your (close and extended) family today?


  1. No one from my family asked if I’m doing ok with the virus. I’ve been struggling with mental health for a long time now and still they don’t know (or want to know?)
    It’s not that there is anger or so, they just don’t seem to care.
    I find that very strange but there is nothing I can do. I don’t get it, like you said, how can you not want to improve yourself? It will remain a mystery to me.

    Liked by 1 person


    1. Self-improvement began for me at a young age. My guess is that it was a sane response to an insane situation (i.e. my family life). It is tough for sure, to have no or limited familial involvement in one’s life. But, I am also reminded that one’s family members will never look at you like your best friends will. And, that even a casual friend can have more appreciation for you than those people. So… yeah. :/

      Liked by 1 person


      1. It was hard for me to let those expectations go but I’m so lucky that I found other people who do care about me. Now that is also held against me (‘you prefer strangers above your own family’!) But that was said years ago and I’ve managed not to care about those ‘accusations’ anymore.
        I think it’s brave that you posted on this subject. For me, it still isn’t an easy one but very much part of life.


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