I am troubled by my delusions and hallucinations.
As someone who has chronic mental health issues, I absolutely hate getting “stuck” with, in many cases, having to ”connect the dots.”
Imagine if you will, that you have affixed your attention, on a person (or persons), and you all of a sudden, begin to think that they don’t like you, or are out to get you, or that they have ill-intentions where you are concerned.
It is tough, and it happens a lot for me!
It comes from out of nowhere seemingly, and unfortunately, sticks around for hours sometimes.
As a result, I am often forced to get a “reality check” from someone close to me.
All I can say is, this is exhausting!
I do what I can to be “talked down,” but I absolutely hate thinking ill of people who haven’t committed any atrocities towards me.
Until science does one better, my meds are all I’ve got.
And, they are far from perfect!
What are some of your core symptoms? And, in what ways do you deal with them?
Mentally Ill In America 
I get paranoid that people are talking about me negatively. Before my meds if my boss closed his door i just knew i was getting fired. It never was true but it was all encompassing.
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I relate to having paranoia. I live with it most days. It stinks. Hugs to you for dealing with this, and making the best of your life!
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I hope science gets its act together on a lot of things related to psychiatry! Luckily I haven’t had to deal with much psychosis, and even when I have, it’s been mild enough that I’m still able to recognize that what I’m experiencing is odd, and that suggests it’s more likely psychotic than real.
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Yeah. Medications need a lot of improvement, but I don’t think they will get it. The future looks like gene therapy or the equivalent.
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I agree
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Medication can help you but will not ‘cure’ you, it won’t take all the difficulties away I guess.
What I can’t ‘beat’ is the fatigue. I deal with it very well and than totally not that good. It means a constant managing of sleep and energy. And that is quite boring to do. It mostly means surrender I guess and accept the way it is but the fact is that I’m very stubborn and I keep on struggling.
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I keep struggling too Kacha. It’s the same for me. I have the depression and then the psychosis, plus I get anxious a lot. I can sometimes tell the difference between them all, and they all are bad.
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I’m not sure they’ll ever get medication right, not in my lifetime anyway. I tend to get paranoid that I’ve upset people so they don’t like me or they’re talking about me to others, then I get suicidal thoughts – and I can’t stand it – it sounds so feeble. I know it’s not real; it’s only voices!
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I feel my control comes in when I share my experiences. Otherwise, I don’t feel like I have much control over these things.
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So it’s good that your sharing your experiences – for both you and for readers. x
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Thank you.
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Me too! I think the thing that bothers me most about my depression/anxiety is that as soon as anything slightly bad happens the voice in my head can’t stop talking about suicide. Even when I have no suicidal feelings at all, it’s exhausting to be thinking about it all the time.
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Hang in there. You’re not alone and I can most definitely relate. The severity of it all seems to come and go.
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You’re right, it’s ups and downs – which is another thing it’s hard to get used to!
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I really feel for you cos that’s what happens to me too. I mean thoughts of suicide are always with me but when something goes wrong, I actually have the worsening suicidal ideation! Like how can I do it – but making it look like an accident 😦
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😦 hang in there too!
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Yeah it’s so weird when your mind can just wander off like that – I suppose we just have to try to remember they’re just thoughts 💖
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Yep, that’s what I do 🙂
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