I don’t know if it’s coincidence, but when I shower, I oftentimes feel better than when I don’t.
And, I will add that it is an interesting phenomenon, not having the energy to do much!
When I think of how I got along before psychosis, I knew there were problems, but not on the level (no where near on the level) to what I experience today.
So, I’ve focused for years on lists and on schedules, and silly me, I keep thinking that’s where my peace lies!
In reality, though… that’s only part of my contentment (when I’m feeling content).
The other part is pushing myself (at least some of the time).
And, I think that is an easy thing to be unable to do… to forget to do as well. Forget in part, as in (again) not having the energy to do it.
Everyone is different, but what has it been like for you when it comes to being chronically ill? Do you push yourself? And, to what degree can you do so?
I feel I do push myself to be who I can be and help my family etc. I spent so many years being self absorbed that now I grapple with all things in my mind. Such regret. I feel at peace when I know I’m improving myself even if it can seem a step forward and two back.
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I’m proud of you for being in that particular head space. There is a lot of self absorption with mental illness and you are keenly aware of that.
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