Where do I begin?
I have been thinking a lot about how I was at different ages of my life, with and without prescription antipsychotics.
And, I am curious about some things.
First off, I do believe my regular regimen of prescription antipsychotics are helping.
Secondly, I wanted to ask myself, were they even necessary to begin with?
I took to taking antipsychotics within six months of having a firm diagnosis that requires them.
And, I was able to see that something indeed needed to be done. Then and now.
I don’t believe that what started all of this was anything but psychosis.
Thankfully, the doctors knew what they were doing with me.
And thankfully, I adhered (and continue to adhere) to their recommendations.
I am still going to feel slighted. I am going to feel cheated. I am going to be upset… all at different intervals.
For I did have a life, all those years ago. It had its problems. But, I was able to do significantly more things in those days, than I could ever do today.
Now, the flip side to this is that I am alive. I get to experience some life, whereas some people don’t get that opportunity, or that opportunity is taken away from them too soon.
So, the only thing I really need to do for myself, with this information, is to note that we are all going to die, but only some of us do get to live.
It’s not a perfect reminder, but Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody, all of a sudden makes sense.
Anyhow, if I had one wish, it would be to see the bulk of my symptoms go into remission.
I have gotten to experience bits and pieces of a good day though.
And, I’m not 100% where I’d like to be, and have to prepare myself, that I may never be.
But, neither will most people, independent of chronic illness even.
That said, I know my illness will continue to improve… if for no other reasons, than time and my very own self-effort.